When we think of child abuse, teenagers don’t readily come to mind as a population that would be impacted by physical, emotional and sexual abuse…yet they are, and more frequently than we’d like to think.  For teenagers, abuse looks and feels different than for an 8 year old or even a 10 year old.  Why is that? 

Though most of us recognize that teens are not “mini-adults” they are often, physically larger. As they continue to develop, they can and do tower over parents and other adults with whom they may interact.  Our perception is that teens can fight back – they are capable of protecting themselves.  Yet, the power differential remains ever present between an adult and an adolescent.  Size and age should not be considered a variable.  Rather, abuse of anyone needs to be seen for what it truly is; an individual exercising power and control over someone less powerful then they are. 

At Response, an adolescent resource program of JCFS, we’ve worked with many teenagers who identify a history of abuse in their lives.  For some it’s emotional abuse: parents or caregivers who repeatedly put them down, threaten their safety, kick them out of the house or call them names. For others it may be physical:  punches, physical punishment with an object, burning them, holding them against their will. 

Still others report sexual abuse at the hands of those who should love and care for them; a parent, guardian or other caregiver.  When children go through puberty they begin to be seen for the first time as sexual beings.  The unwanted entry into a bedroom in the middle of the night…  An uncle who had too much to drink and whose hands begin to wander during a family reunion….  In family systems where boundaries are fluid and roles may not be clearly defined, sexual abuse can occur and the accompanying feelings of betrayal and loss are truly indescribable.  

It may be hard for us to believe a teenager when he or she tells us that they have experienced abuse. After all, they are independent beings, capable of fighting back or fleeing such situations.  But, more often than not, that teen has few safe places to go and fighting back may mean retribution, further endangering themselves or their siblings. Often, older children in an abusive family system become the de-facto protector of younger siblings.  The sense is that as long as they continue to put up with the abuse, the abuser will leave the younger children alone. 

Some teens do choose to flee; that’s why we know of so many youth who are homeless, who run away multiple times or who “couch surf” with friends for weeks, sometimes months at a time.  Take the case of Ron, an 18 year old graduating senior who had been homeless for over a year.  His mentally ill mother had physically abused him as a child and into his early teens.  His father came to his rescue once he began high school, taking in Ron and his younger brother.  Then he remarried and started a new family.  The boys didn’t get along with their stepmother so he kicked them out.  Ron ended up sleeping on friend’s couches until he was finally accepted into college on a scholarship.  The scars of his childhood and adolescence run very deep. 

Lisa struggled with her identity beginning in 6^th grade.  She tried to talk with her parents about her feelings of being “different” but they always cut her off whenever she tried to tell them. An extremely religious family, they simply could not fathom such an affront to their beliefs.  During her freshman year in high school she couldn’t stand feeling as though she were living with a secret.  She came out to her parents.  They disowned her and kicked her out of the house.  She hasn’t seen them or her sister in over a year.  A distant cousin took her in but the situation is unstable at best.  There’s nowhere safe for her to go.   

Teens can and do experience an array of abuse in their lives and often the result of them sharing or disclosing such information is not taken as seriously as it should be.  Calls to hotlines begin with questions like “how old is the victim?”  “How large are they?”  “Are there visible marks on their bodies?”  “Are they afraid of the perpetrator?”  After a teen has finally gotten up the courage to share their deepest, darkest secret with someone, they are most often met with disbelief or complete dismissal, leaving them feeling resentful, angry, hopeless and unprotected by our community. 

Adolescents who have experienced abuse often slip through the cracks of everyone’s conscious awareness.   How could that be?  They are experiencing so much dramatic change in their lives, across so many spectrums:  physically, psychologically and cognitively.  Add to that the fact that teens themselves may not immediately identify that what they have experienced is abuse. There’s a host of reasons for this, including: fear of retribution; the sense that somehow the abuse was their fault; mixed feelings of both love and fear of the perpetrator; guilt about what might have led them into an unsafe situation. 

Adolescents who have experienced abuse may exhibit any of the following behaviors: night terrors or difficulty sleeping; a change in eating habits; sudden mood swings; hyper vigilance in terms of their environments; becoming secretive or withdrawn; exhibiting self-disgust or body image issues. They may regress to a younger age with accompanying behaviors.  They may also engage in self-harming behaviors (cutting, burning, etc.).  Hygiene may become an issue.  Engagement in drug and alcohol use is a possibility.  Frequently, teens may engage in promiscuous behavior which can include multiple partners and unsafe sexual activity.

Of course, many of these symptoms or behaviors may be exhibited due to a host of other reasons such as depression; impending divorce; loss of a family member, close friend or pet; troubles at school; bullying, etc.  These behaviors alone are not the only indicators that a teen has been abused.  

As helping adults, parents, educators and community members we need to be aware of the potential risks our youth face and vigilant about intervening; asking the right questions when our gut tell us something is wrong.  Our teens need and deserve our protection. 

So….what can we do?  Well, educating ourselves and others is a good start.  Recognizing the signs and symptoms of abuse in adolescents and letting others know about what you believe is happening is another way to help.  A third way is by remembering that teens are still children on their way to adulthood and in order for them to arrive there in a safe, healthy and happy way, they need adults to stand beside them along that entire journey. 

The words come screaming across the news crawl at the bottom of the screen, “Paterno out at Penn State”.  For anyone who is interested in college football, this is a shock.  What could possibly have caused this?  Joe Paterno, a fixture as the coach of the Penn State Nittany Lions, holder of 409 career victories, forced out of coaching.  More news comes out; Paterno supposedly knew about an assistant coach who was allegedly seen molesting a boy in the Penn State Athletic Complex, and simply told his superiors.  As news organizations continue to dig, it becomes clear that there was a cover-up of epic proportions at Penn State.

This story feels eerily similar to other cover-ups of sexual abuse.  Those who are in positions of power focusing on the needs of the abuser, or the needs of the organization, rather than the needs of the survivors, or the needs of the innocent.  Leaving countless other children to be victimized because…….

Why exactly?  What keeps individuals from reporting cases of abuse?  Especially, clear-cut incidents?  What about incidents that were witnessed by others?

As so many people and communities are reeling in the wake of the ongoing revelations coming out related to the Penn State sexual abuse charges, Response (an adolescent program of JCFS) stands poised for action and commentary.  But where to begin?  The issue of child sexual abuse is certainly not a new one to this organization. Indeed JCFS has been working to educate the public and our communities, treat its victims and survivors and advocate for policies and protocols that would close some of the loopholes open to potential predators in schools, camps, synagogues and other arenas for many years. 

In Illinois, as in other states, we have laws related to mandated reporting; signs and symptoms to look for and what to do when you “suspect” there might be any type of child abuse occurring anywhere.  And that word “suspect” is critical because it’s not up to the mandated reporter to investigate to determine the actuality of abuse, it’s simply up to those of us who fall under the legal definition of mandated reporters to inform those in the child welfare system as to our suspicions; investigations and outcome determinations are left to the experts in the field of child abuse. 

While the letter of the law (specifically the Mandated Report Law) may not cover a circumstance like Penn State, our moral compasses certainly should.  The mandated reporter guidelines include coaches (those working with youth in any professional capacity).  Yet, because most college athletes are above the age of 18 and so, are no longer considered a minor, most of the victims fall between the cracks of our legal system. Despite this fact, the very clear element of the power dynamic evident within the context of a coach’s position to their athletes is glaringly obvious.

Let’s examine two aspects of abuse that are particularly relevant to this current situation:  Betrayal and Healing.

The level of betrayal a survivor experiences is directly correlated with the level of the relationship victims may have with their perpetrators.  So, the literature tells us that the concept of “stranger danger” in these incidents, while actually relatively rare, may have a better outcome for a survivor in terms of their feeling less betrayed.  When a perpetrator is a loved one, family member, relative, member of the clergy or (as in this case) a beloved and revered mentor and/or coach, the immensity of the issue of betrayal, directly correlated to one’s healing process, is enormously significant and can negatively impact the healing process.  Unfortunately, the boys allegedly victimized by this individual were not only betrayed by him, but by the administrators of the school as well.  Nothing delegitimizes the experience more for survivors than the fact that this individual was able to continue to hold a respected position in this major college sports program and to act with impunity for years after the incidents were first reported.

Since traumatic events typically occur within the context of some type of relationship, so too does the healing process.  It is a well-known and documented fact in the research literature that long term healing is best achieved when the response to victim’s disclosure is appropriate.  What does that entail?  When victims are believed; assured that what happened was not their fault; and when perpetrators and systems involved take swift ownership over what has happened.  Quick, supportive, healing interventions are imperative to a survivor’s healing process.  Clearly, that has been sorely missing in the Penn State case.